The Stepfather

I found a blog on here that was so readable.

It concerned the life of an average 30-something man with a new wife and baby, and a teenage step-daughter.

On first reading, it is such an innocent blog, all family get-togethers and pictures of happy holidays (obviously not short a bob or two). However, there was also an inordinate amount of seductive pictures of his 15 year old stepdaughter, and a preoccupation with her virginity to the point he was giving her advice and discussing it all in his blog.

Surely this man isnt so naive that he thinks this is OK? Or is it OK, and Im overreacting? The mother is barely mentioned at all, certainly not in the graphic detail his daughters life and feelings are, so Im assuming she finds no harm.

Then again, is the world full of lecherous middle aged men trying to mask an obsession with the teenagers around them? How many girls live in this situation? I recall a school friend (30 years ago) being completely freaked by her stepfather, even though he never laid a hand on her. The way he watched her however, spoke volumes. She endured, until she was old enough to leave home, but always felt abused with no resolution or solid reasons why.

My own brother tried to sexually abuse me when he was 13 and I was 8. Fortunately I have always had a strong sense of right and wrong, so I threw a tantrum and made him take me home. I have never forgotten, and I never told anyone else because I knew I would be called a liar. That however, is the family I grew up in - a story best saved for another time.

I still recall the feelings of guilt and dirtiness I felt that day. Somehow it had happened because of me. The horror I felt when a previously trusted and loved figure in my life tried to molest me, was devastating. I still dont like talking about it. If there is any man reading this, or any woman who harbours a question, please do not underestimate the horrible consequences of this sort of crime. Even a near miss is still traumatising, 40 years later.

Now, my brother is now a headmaster with 6 kids of his own. Another happy family?